The Ugly Truth About Dating A Japanese Woman. True or False?

Updated: Nov 7, 2018


Dating a Japanese woman would probably sound like a cool and interesting idea to many since Japanese woman feels "exotic" and many are known to be kawaii (cute). It is heard of that Japanese ladies are rather submissive hence your wish will be their command. On top of that, Japanese ladies make good house wives so you'll be taken good care of by them. But isn’t this a little too good to be true?

Of course, every single person has their good and bad sides. However, most Japanese women typically have these following issues:


1. Controlling over finances

Of course this occurs in other countries as well. But Japanese women tend to manage all the money brought back by their husbands. It's common in Japan for the husband to work hard and then give all of his paycheck to his wife even if she is not working or is a housewife.

The Japanese wife has the final say about every purchase. From household items, vehicles to vacations. This might be a problem for anyone who prefers financial liberation and independence as they will not be used to this "controlling culture".


2. Hiding feelings/grudges

Most Asians tend to be less open about their feelings than the Westerners. They would rather hide their true feelings or even their grudges than to confide and confront with the person involved. Perhaps it's a culture for many Japanese women, they will avoid speaking directly or candidly. For example when they are posed a yes or no question, their reply would be "maybe" with a sweet smile which in actual fact, means no.


One certainly must be sensitive enough to keep up with her passive aggressive game and to maintain his relationship with the Japanese woman. Else, you wouldn’t know why she's suddenly not talking to you anymore or you wouldn't know that she's low key mad at you. Consider if this will be mentally and emotionally draining on yourself before you decide to make a Japanese woman your girlfriend!


3. Mental health

Ever heard that Japan has the highest suicide rate in the world? Apart from this, due to the huge amount of stress and expectations that many have to cope with, it is not surprising that many are prone to mental illness such as depression or schizophrenia. It's sad that one might develop/suffer from mental illness but it is even more depressing that most of them do not seek medical treatments because they do not want to admit that they are ill.


Mentally ill patients are heavily stigmatized in Japan as Japanese value conformity. As such, anyone out of sorts will be ostracized by the public. Since many do not get their mental health checked out/seek treatment, many of them out there might secretly be a mental patient. Japanese also determine their self-worth by how others perceive them. Should they get ostracized or looked down upon as a result of their incompetency, the decision to commit suicide will not hesitate to cross their mind.



4. Estranged from your children


For foreigners who filed for divorce with their Japanese wives, there is a low chance that they will get to meet their children again. The Japanese court system is behind the Japanese women and will by law, grant them custody of the children. The ex-wife will take the children away from her foreigner ex-husband and part ways.

The points mentioned above are what many Japanese women would do in general. Therefore it is good to know these issues before you make a decision to start a relationship with a Japanese woman.